To all staff, friends, and family of the Inquiry & Zero Fucks branches of TEKNO, INC.:
HR requests your presence at our third annual company holiday party at Monarch on Friday, December 8th, 2023 (or the Fourth Annual for those of you who made it to Tulum for the unofficial party). After the pandemic forced us to host our 2020 event on the cloud, then forced (yes, again, we know,) the last-minute cancellation of our IRL gathering in 2022, we are once again moving forward with returning to a mandatory in-person event.
Our holiday party is to reward our dedicated TEKNO employees and discuss our predictions for the upcoming year.
Please represent the company professionally during this holiday gathering. All employees and interns (you) will need to sign our NDA (Non-Disco Agreement) upon arrival.
We will provide more details on tickets, musical guidances, and the many *strongly recommended but not required* activities for our staff soon. In the meantime, here’s a glimpse of what you can expect:
- Motivational PowerPoints
- Coworkers You’ve Never Met Not On Zoom Before
- Questionable Workplace Activities
- Micromanaging As A Bonding Activity
- Performance Reviews By Managers Dressed As Santa
- “Did You Know The Entire C-Suite Are DJs?”, the Musical
- Bathroom Karaoke
- Recession-Proofing Tequila Shots
We’ve put together a few cheaper ticket tiers since we couldn’t afford raises for the last three years as well. Please take advantage of them before, as usual, middle management takes them all for themselves.
Regards,
Your TEKNO, Inc Executive Team
-- About Zero Fucks --
What's this whole Zero Fucks thing about anyway? We're a camaraderie-heavy crew that loves new friends and great music. We don't put up with bullshit on the dancefloor, we love being playful on the DJ decks, we love to techno, we travel the world in search of next level vibes.
-- About Inquiry Collective --
Inquiry brings carefully selected music, dynamic experiences, and unbound artistic expression for the curious at heart.
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